Vikings – Bloodthirsty romp hits the mark

With more tits and ass than a Berlusconi “Bunga Bunga” party Vikings is the perfect TV series to rev up your weekends. The action starts with our protagonist Ragnar involved in brutal hand to hand combat and it doesn’t let up for the entire series. Add in a cultural backdrop where inviting your buddy to […]

With more tits and ass than a Berlusconi “Bunga Bunga” party Vikings is the perfect TV series to rev up your weekends.

The action starts with our protagonist Ragnar involved in brutal hand to hand combat and it doesn’t let up for the entire series. Add in a cultural backdrop where inviting your buddy to join in for a threesome is considered a sign of mateship; you can see striking similarities between ancient Scandinavian culture and what happens at after match parties in the AFL.

The series moves through various stages of Viking history from the first arrival in England, where they attack Lindisfarne monastery giving a glimpse into the roots English football hooliganism. Also, we see where the mullet haircut originated and the eating habits of using hands to eat food favoured today in Kentucky Fried Chicken.

More accurate historically than Braveheart which to be frank was a load of old bollocks, there is no doubt that if this series was added to the Australian high school curriculum, history and human biology could be merged together into one subject and would be popular with students and teachers alike.

Applauded for its attention detail and realistic portrayal of Vikings, they definitely would have benefitted from soap and the basic oral hygiene that we take for granted today.

There are many sub-plots throughout the series; the most interesting being the friendship that develops between Ragnar and a monk he takes as his slave called Aethelstan. As they learn each other’s language and customs Aethelstan discovers being a man of the cloth is really quite boring and develops a penchant for killing, drinking and magic mushrooms; shamelessly losing his virginity to a brazen hussy during a shindig where nine people end up being sacrificed.  Say what you will about the raping and marauding scumbags they certainly knew how to party.

When all’s said and done Vikings is a thoroughly entertaining romp through history, with a little bit of everything to keep the proletariat and the middle class’s eyes glued to the screen and preventing them from doing something useful with their lives.

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