First Dates – Channel 7’s fascinating study of human behaviour

As if proof were needed, First Dates is giving yet another platform to show wankers will do anything to get on TV. The format is very similar to the British version of the program – grating participants being watched by a voyeuristic public that thrives on seeing nobodies humiliate themselves. And it’s a winning formula! Once you […]

As if proof were needed, First Dates is giving yet another platform to show wankers will do anything to get on TV. The format is very similar to the British version of the program – grating participants being watched by a voyeuristic public that thrives on seeing nobodies humiliate themselves.

And it’s a winning formula! Once you start watching and see the awkward conversations unfold you cannot help but hold your head in your hands and be reminded of your own terrible experiences. The bumbling, the fumbling, the wishing you could get out of there, the trying to impress someone you are attracted to when clearly they are not interested.  You are thrust into this world, cheering on your favourites and hoping they will prevail.

Who wouldn’t want the delightful platinum-haired lesbian Renee to find the love of her life? Unfortunately, she gets stuck with Cruella Deville look-alike model Aimee who is a pretentious vegetarian. To make matters worse, she is also a Kiwi! Despite Renee’s courageous attempts to start a conversation and be friendly, Aimee forgets the down to earth charm that her country is famous for and acts like an uptight New York tart pushing into a queue for a Louis Vuitton bag sale.

The final conclusion is painful as “Aimee the cow” runs down our heroine, Renee. We feel her pain, wanting to comfort her with a hug and perhaps a hip-flask of Jack Daniels to heal the wounds inflicted by the citizen of a country known only for Rugby and sheep.

By programs end, we go to bed a little more educated but perhaps cynical about the human condition. However, we could well tune in next week to cheer on the new combatants as they search for love in all the wrong places.

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