In a despicable oversight, the powers that be in our humble shire have let the glory of the Camberwell Civic Centre sign go to seed.
As the summer arrives, the plants around the sign have run amok and if not tended to soon threaten to cover the sign completely. Camberwellians know that left uncorrected it won’t be long before this once proud suburb will quickly be on the slippery slope of headlining 7 News with stories of gangs taking over.
The leader of the Apex gang has already made his intentions clear that Camberwell is a possible candidate for an expansion move.
“That’s right playas, once they let the sign go you know they vulnerable. We’re looking into it. Man…F*** Camberwell!” the young larrikin explained in threatening tones.
The local constabulary are taking the remarks seriously and have warned new Boroondara Mayor Phillip Healey to take immediate action or suffer dire consequences. BurkeMan the local superhero has also come out from a brief hiatus and given his two cents worth, “ I don’t care what it takes, even if it requires a geriatric volunteer with a pair of scissors… just clean up that sign Godammit! This is Camberwell we’re talking about!”
New Mayor Healey declined to comment on the fiasco in the first real test of his leadership since taking over the reigns from former Grand Poobah Jim Parke who has been demoted to mini-poobah.