Before he died, famed moviemaker Stanley Kubrick wanted to make a porno but instead, he made the movie Eyes Wide Shut, which Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman starred in together. In the story, poor Tom was overcome by jealousy as his wife recounted in a marijuana induced haze how she wanted a man in his naval uniform to give her a right good seeing to.
After this, our hero Tom has an adventure that most of us can only dream of, involving going to a costume hire shop where the owner’s daughter gets caught out with a couple of Asian businessmen, a close encounter with a street walker and finally a party in a mansion that would make a Kew swingers party regular eyes water.
“When I saw the movie it really opened my eyes to how the other half lives. When I have a party I usually go to the local Woolies and get a packet of corn chips and salsa dip but these guys really went to town! You needed to have a password just to get in and there was a massive gate at the front with security. Once you got through the gate there was a flash limo that drove you up to the front door. Then inside that’s when the action started, you had to put on a mask and there was loads of hot babes doing pagan rituals who got paired off with rich businessman types. It was fab!” explained a passerby.
So what has this got to do with Camberwell? “Well it was this massive gate here! If you put two blokes in suits and overcoats out the front asking for the password ‘Fidelio’ it would have been like a scene from the movie.”
There are times when Camberwell is unfairly misconstrued as a suburb where not much really happens but with a rampant imagination anything is possible.